This blog began as a journey to subvert expectations. A place in the corner of the web, which no one would chance upon. Where I would discover what I like to think about, what I like to talk about. A place where my creativity would not be determined by the affirmations I receive. This is my secret, kept between me and you. Yet, as this blog grows daily and I receive a few dollops of encouragement, my trained mind automatically asks, is this what they like to read, should I write more of that? Avoiding expectations is difficult, especially when your endgame is to be appreciated by others. It’s not very difficult to be liked by others, just do what they want you to do. It’s when you want to be your true self and yet liked by others that the complication arises. For, when you put yourself out there completely, and you receive brickbats there is nowhere to hide but accept yourself the way you are. In most cases though, no matter who you are, people appreciate honesty and conviction. Even if you are a bitch, you honesty to yourself may be your only redeeming quality.
So, back to the topic how do we live our lives without letting expectations overburden us? Expectations may be from friends, family, peers and more importantly your own self. We were closest to our true self, when we were children. As we grew up, we let our societal conditioning take over. As adults we need to bring out our younger versions. If we have to receive cues from anyone, it should be from our younger selves. All the other expectations, needs to be avoided like a plague. It’s difficult to trust your own instincts rather than be guided by people, but give it some time and thought and it happens. That is why some of the best art, song, and literature is born purely out of an urge to produce and not to provide. I struggled with these questions for a while, and it made me stop for some time but I am glad to be back on track again.